Lately I have been feeling down about my husband's employment situation again. I feel like I am on a pendulum that swings between feeling surprisingly positive about our future and feeling like he is going to struggle in his career for the rest of our lives. When am on the latter swing, I get this terrible pit in my stomach and want to give up.
Especially when I look realistically at why things may not be working out the way we had hoped.
You see, my husband has always wanted to work on the international side of things. That involves travel. Often lots of it. Travel involves being away from us for long periods of time.
Sometimes I worry that God knows better. Maybe He knows that our marriage wouldn't stand up to that test.
As if unemployment and difficulty pursuing a career and him feeling like a failure and me not being able to be home with our kids weren't hard enough, the possibility that this could all lead back to the addiction makes me sick.
Waiting for the pendulum to swing back to the other side. I could use some positive thinking right now. I will be patient.